Devotional Ideas for Enneagram 3s: Loved Before the Next Win

By Nick Vogel· May 10, 2023Enneagram 3 — The AchieverEnneagram Heart Center (2, 3, 4)
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A man runs up to Jesus, kneels in the dust, and asks what he must do to inherit eternal life. Everything about him says high performer. He's kept the commandments since he was a boy, he's built real wealth, and even his question is an achiever's question. What do I have to do? Give me the goal and I'll hit it.

Mark includes a detail the other Gospels don't: "Jesus looked at him and loved him" (Mark 10:21). Before the man passes or fails anything, he is loved. Then comes the assignment he can't take. Sell everything, give it to the poor, follow me. And "he went away sad, because he had great wealth" (Mark 10:22). It's one of the only times in the Gospels someone walks away from a direct invitation from Jesus, and what he couldn't set down wasn't just money. It was everything the money proved about him.

If your sense of worth tracks a little too closely with your last win, read the order in Mark 10:21 again. Loved first. Asked second. These three practices are for learning to live in that order.

Hidden on Purpose

Paul had a résumé worth boasting about and lists it to the Philippians just to make his point. Then he does the math on it: "I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ" (Philippians 3:8). Not garbage because achievement is evil. Garbage next to something worth more.

Here's where to start. Do one act of service or devotion this week that nobody will ever find out about. Give without the record showing anywhere. Serve where no one who saw it knows your name. Pray for someone who will never learn you did. An achiever needs at least one corner of life where worth isn't being witnessed, because a hidden act answers the question performance keeps asking. If it still counts when no one sees it, then you still count when no one's watching.

Pray the Résumé

False modesty won't help you here. You know what you've accomplished, and pretending you don't is its own performance. So do what Paul did, and take the list to God with everything on it.

Name your accomplishments in prayer, plainly, without shrinking them. The degree, the business, the numbers, the reputation, whatever your list holds. Thank him for what was gift in all of it, because plenty was. Then pray Paul's next sentence over the list: "I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord" (Philippians 3:7-8). Say it as a trade you actually mean, knowing him over being known for the list. You may find you have to pray this one more than once before it stops feeling like a loss and starts feeling like the better deal. Paul called it surpassing worth, and he'd held both.

A Day With Nothing to Show

Genesis says God finished his work, "so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy" (Genesis 2:2-3). Rest is stitched into creation by a God who never runs out of energy, which means the seventh day isn't recovery. It's a statement, that the work has an edge, and what's on the other side of the edge is still blessed.

For you, an empty day threatens something deeper than the schedule. A day with nothing accomplished can feel like a day you weren't anyone. Take one on purpose. Block a stretch of time this week with a firm rule, nothing produced, nothing checked off, nothing to report afterward. When the itch to accomplish something shows up, and it will, bring the itch to God instead of scratching it. Whoever you are in that unproductive stretch of hours, loved with no output to point at, is who you've been the entire time.

He Loved Him First

The rich young man walked away sad, and the tragedy is that he walked away from someone who already loved him. The love wasn't waiting on the far side of the assignment. It came first, and it would have carried him through the letting go. Keep achieving. The drive to set a goal and reach it builds businesses, ministries, and futures, and God isn't asking you to misplace it. He's asking you to stop making it prove something that was settled before your first win. Hide one act. Trade the résumé up. Take the day with nothing to show for it. You were loved at the starting line.

Frequently asked questions

Can Enneagram type 3s work well in a team environment?

Enneagram type 3s can be excellent team players, as they are often highly motivated and goal-oriented. However, they may need help recognizing the contributions of others and learning to work collaboratively rather than competitively. It can be helpful for them to have a supportive team environment that values both individual achievement and collective success.

How can Enneagram type 3s improve their personal growth and development?

Enneagram type 3s can benefit from taking time to reflect on their values and priorities, and learning to be more authentic and vulnerable with others. They can also benefit from recognizing that their worth is not solely based on their achievements, and learning to prioritize their own well-being over external validation.

What are some common challenges that Enneagram type 3s face?

Enneagram type 3s can struggle with feeling like they are only as good as their last success or achievement. They may have a tendency to push themselves too hard and neglect their own needs in the pursuit of success. They may also struggle with authenticity and may feel pressure to present a polished and perfect image to others.

What are some common strengths of Enneagram type 3?

Enneagram type 3s are often driven, focused, and highly productive. They are often skilled at networking and building relationships, and may have a talent for marketing or sales. They are typically highly competitive and thrive on achieving their goals.

What are some common struggles for Enneagram 3s?

Enneagram 3s can struggle with feeling a need to constantly perform and achieve, leading to burnout and anxiety. They may also struggle with valuing their self-worth based on external validation and success rather than their inherent value as a person. It can be helpful for Enneagram 3s to prioritize self-care and to focus on inner growth and personal fulfillment rather than external success.

How can Enneagram 3s relate to Jesus?

Enneagram 3s can relate to Jesus by focusing on his message of love and humility rather than achievement and success. Jesus emphasized serving others and putting their needs before our own. Enneagram 3s can use their drive and ambition to serve others and make a positive impact rather than solely focusing on personal success.

What is an Enneagram 3?

An Enneagram 3 is a personality type characterized as the "Achiever" or "Performer." They are ambitious, goal-oriented, and success-driven. They often strive to be the best and can be competitive and image-conscious.